holidays are here ! whee ! 1 week of no school !
i totally deserve this break la.it's a good time to just go slow...do the things i love...catch up alittle on work.
tommorow having training. cant wait to play soccer ! i dunno why but i have this sudden urge to play alot!
such a wet blanket man . supposed to go johor this commin saturday. end up organising a hike for the Scouts instead. argh. but nevertheless , hiking is still one of my favourite activities la.
it's been pretty gooooooooooooooooooood for me lately. things are going smooooth. i wonder why..
sometimes, i feel that being happy is all that matters. you just need to be happy , and somehow things go totally awesome for you.
have you guys ever felt when you were sad and angry, somehow you always trip and fall...your shoe laces get ties easily...you forget to bring your keys when you go out and get stuck outside the house door when u go home...you forget to bring your homework , your hair gets messy all the time , you feel tired and lethargic frequently , tend to fall sick , forget important dates and test, and even wear your underwear on the wrong side ! Girls stop looking at you ! LOL.
I wonder why .hmm.
I think being busy and doing the things i love takes my mind off all the dumb , lame relationship problems i encounter. When i think back about it ...wah lao i think it's reallly sibei lame and childish of me la.lol. i realised that within this 2-3 weeks , i actually mature and aged alot.lol.
i am also happy a certain somebody talked to me. it shows that at least she still values us being friends , and that's all i want . I think singlehood at this age is actually pretty good. in fact i never felt so good about being single before , except maybe after sy that period la.lol. maybe i should just be a monk forever and just not marry la. that way i can have "fun" as long as i live.lol.but i still have affection for her sia. hmm.wonder if she has. i doubt she does anymore la seriously.she's like kindda a flower..though i dunno why she is a flower la...attracting alot of male honey bees.lol.so many to choose from.lol. ok that's damn lame but yeah.but even if dun have , nvm le la.there's probably another guy meant for her or something.and another better girl for me!lol.oh well.love sucks eh ,anson and leon?
lost love usually results in lost of best friends too. it seems we have drifted and drifted...and well , it just seems weird to talk. actually ,more of like nothing to talk about. i now realise if there's a girl that's my best friend or something , i can't get her to be my girlfriend after that. to lose a best friend like this is just...plain shitty..i am very fearful of losing more best friends due to this.sometimes, i am just pretty pissed la dunno with her or with myself or with both of us , that we couldn't maintain the "best friend forever" status we both talked about in the event we broke up.lol.say what if we talk about this during our relationship , we have higher chances of maintaining it.lol.what bullshit.
maybe it's just an emotional barrier both of us have to overcome. lol.
Sometimes, i just think being single is good...i can chase my dreams without being held back..i dun have to feel like well...the feeling of attached la.but at times , i still hold on the tiny , slimest chance of us getting back at the end of the year, which is pretty unrealistic la.maybe because i am a SENTIMENTAL person.lol. always thinking about the happy past we lived in.lol.
darn. why can't she just say " yeah i no feeling liao" or "another guy la". that crushes all hope and i can stop hoping.lol.which is totally pointless and a waste of my time and energy.
but we all gotta moooove on. at times , i think i am pretty gay and foolish to hold on to this love.lol.well , if you can call it love in the 1st place la.lol.she probably dosen't even have the slightest thought about it anymore.or maybe who noes...got another guy liao!lol.
maybe this is just a tit-for-a-tat la. who ask me last time so........disregard other girls feelings too.keep fooling around.
after this whole episode , i really quite distrustful about girls regarding relationships already.lol. seeing that the friends around me also all 1 by 1 breaking up.shawn...jason...samuel..anson..leon...and the list just goes on la.lol. i talked like i kanna traumatised and scarred for life by this already.
anyhooo how, heck la. i ain't really bothered by it anymore , just rattering my thoughts la.haha.i feel so empowered now.my priorities now are my studies and to fulfil my ambition.if i have the time , i wanna save the envrionment too!
i kindda miss talking to certain people .oh man.i really hope i get more chances to talk to them man. how i wish i can get individual people to just sit by vivo and just chat with me , just like i got her on 15/11 at vivo to chat till the next morning. =]
And, i don't like the other her la ! 18 years old already guys and you guys still act like primary school kids pointing fingers at the "eee you like her" game. wtf man uber gay.